what happens if you run in front of a car
you get tired
what happens if you run behind a car
you get exhausted
this is comedy gold. you should take notes
I was honest expecting the punchlines to be “You die”
What happens if you sleep with a moose?
You die.
(via natsunotori)
i farted in the apple store and everyone got mad but it wasnt my fault they don’t have Windows
get out
(via annicornshinoda)
I don’t know bout y’all, but the Yahoo staff are fucking HILARIOUS
We are not fucking HILARIOUS
HILARIOUS COME HERE AND TELL THEM THAT WE ARE NOT FUCKING
theyahoostaff and i are just friends gOD
(via annicornshinoda)
i fell in love with him like ketchup falls out of a bottle: slowly, and then all at once.
oh my god you managed to one up john green.
(via violetfrut)
From the moment I saw you, I knew I was gonna spend the rest of my life avoiding you.
(via beautiful-hallucination)
